Chuck and Andy

Medical Information:

General Health:

Both Chuck and Andy are in generally good health - no known serious conditions.

Fertility Information:

We have 5 embryos that are PGT-A tested. We are using known donor eggs. We have a good relationship with our egg donor and plan on keeping her updated throughout our surrogacy process. If necessary we are willing to create more embryos.

Fertility Clinic:

Generation Fertility Toronto West

Why are you looking for a Surrogate?

From the time we met, we always knew that we wanted to start a family together - a family similar to the ones that we grew up in. A family full of love and support. We also wanted to have children that had some biological connection to us. Unfortunately, as a same sex couple, there are few options for us to grow our family. After talking through our options, we thought working with a Surrogate would be the best path forward. We are excited to work with a Surrogate and will be eternally grateful to the woman who is willing to help us start our family.

Tell us about your family & loved ones.

All four of our parents are extremely excited to meet their grandkids! We expect to keep them updated throughout this process and know that they will be involved in our kids’ lives when they are born. (This will be Chuck’s parents’ first grandchild and they are excited to spoil their future grandchild). Our siblings are also very supportive - they can’t wait to have a niece or nephew (for Chuck’s siblings - their first; for Andy’s siblings - one of several :)). Andy’s siblings are also excited for their kids to meet their cousins and have someone else to play with at family gatherings.

Our friends and co-workers have been very supportive. We’ve had many friends check-in and ask about the process as we went through the egg donation/embryo creation stages of this journey. We’ve been pretty open about this process with nearly all people in our lives and have received nothing but love and support in response.

Would you like to attend appointments with your Surrogate?

We would like to attend several appointments, particularly, the bigger check-in appointments like the first ultrasounds and prenatal visits. Due to work and travel constraints, it’s unlikely we’d be able to attend all of them in person, but would like to go to as many as possible. Alternatively, we’re open to attending virtually if possible.

What are your thoughts on termination of a pregnancy due to genetic abnormalities or complications related to the pregnancy?

We have talked about this at length and tried to think past the difficult emotions wrapped up in that possibility. In terms of genetic abnormalities, we would be comfortable terminating a pregnancy if there is a low chance of survival or an impossibly difficult quality of life. That being said, we would be perfectly comfortable raising a child with genetic abnormalities so long as those aren’t fatal (Down syndrome, etc.).
For complications, we are comfortable terminating if there is a substantial risk to the health and safety of our future Surrogate. Surrogacy is, at its core, an incredibly generous and selfless act from a Surrogate to our family. We recognize that this would be her choice and would support her if termination occurred due to substantial health complications.

If the Surrogate becomes pregnant with multiples, how would you feel? How do you feel about the possibility of selective reduction being recommended due to a multiple pregnancy?

We would welcome any multiples into our lives. We do want to prioritize the safety of both the Surrogate as well as the child(ren) so we would work with the Surrogate, doctors, and nurses to determine the best plan of action.
We would prefer not to have selective reduction if possible, but would recognize the need for that if there is substantial risk to our Surrogate.

Are you vaccinated for Covid-19? Do you have a preference for a Surrogate to have been vaccinated for Covid-19?

Both of us have been vaccinated for Covid-19. We would prefer the Surrogate to have been previously vaccinated for Covid-19.

What kind of relationship do you want to have the your Surrogate during the pregnancy?

We would hope to have at least short daily interactions with the Surrogate (text messaging, sending photos, short calls, etc.) to get updates on how she is and how everything is going. We would welcome longer calls as well as in-person visits once in a while.

Do you want to be in the delivery room when your child is born?

We would have a strong preference to be in the delivery room when our child is born and hope to be able to establish immediate skin to skin contact with our child.

What kind of relationship do you hope to have with your Surrogate after the birth of your child?

We would like to stay in contact with our Surrogate on a regular basis through photos, text messages, and video chats. We would want to be able to meet in-person when able, but realize that geographic constraints may make that difficult. We would hope that our Surrogate would want to keep in touch with us and have a long-term relationship with us and our child. We would also want to one day introduce our children to the Surrogate.

Would you be open to a home birth?

We strongly believe in science and medicine and have had some traumatic experiences in our family with homebirths. We have a strong preference towards a birth in a hospital.

Are you open to midwifery care?

We would be open but would have a strong preference for an OBGYN, especially in the case of high risk or complicated pregnancies. We would just want what is best for the Surrogate and the child(ren).

Would you like your Surrogate to provide breastmilk?

We would prefer to have the Surrogate provide breastmilk at first, at least as long as we are in Canada.

What will you tell the child about the Surrogate, and the circumstances of their birth? If the child asks to meet the Surrogate, how will you feel?

As our child(ren) get older, we realize they will learn about how children are born. We expect to answer their questions, have a variety of resources prepared for them (letters from Surrogate/ egg donor/ us, pictures of egg donor/ Surrogate, etc.), and explain to them why we chose to start our family in this way. We hope to eventually have a similar conversation with the Surrogate either in person or via video call to help our child(ren) understand. Additionally, we would like our child(ren) to maintain some kind of relationship with the Surrogate and egg donor throughout their lives even if that relationship is only an occasional check-in.

If the transfer is unsuccessful, will you want to try again? If so, how soon after?

Yes, we would like to try again if the transfer is unsuccessful. We would work with the Surrogate and see how she is feeling. We realize that situations like this can be very emotional and traumatic for everyone involved so we want to give as much time as needed. If they would not like to try again, we’d fully understand.

If this surrogacy journey is successful, would you want to complete a sibling journey? What do you envision that looking like? (timeline, same Surrogate etc.)

We would like to complete a sibling journey at some point if our first journey is successful. We would hope to try to start that process shortly after our first child is born so that the siblings are relatively close in age. We both grew up with siblings that were relatively near us age-wise and thought that was a wonderful experience. If our Surrogate is willing to carry for us for a sibling journey, that would be amazing. However, we are honestly so excited for our first child that it's hard to think too much past that at this point.

What are your plans for childcare once the child is born?

Both of our employers provide generous paternity leave so for the first six months or so we would be fully caring for the child(ren) at home. As the child ages, we would like to enroll them in a daycare for at least 3-4 days a week. This may change depending on our work-from-home situations. We also have two sets of generous grandparents (our parents) who would love to watch their grandchild(ren) and I’m sure our children’s great-grandparents would help too (depending on their health).

What does a typical weekend look like for you?

On Fridays, we usually like to go out for dinner and then relax at home for the evening. We love to play board/ card games and/or watch a film. We also, of course, frequently use Fridays to catch up with friends over a meal out or at a brewery.
On Saturdays, we like to hike with our dogs, visit coffee shops, check-out bookstores, and usually spend the afternoon or evening with some friends.
On Sundays, we often clean up the house a little bit, relax with our dogs, and have dinner with our family in the evening. In the fall, we love watching football (Chuck is a diehard football fan and played in University).

What are some of your interests/ activities?

We both love to read, travel, visit National Parks, and listen to music. We frequently go hiking and biking together. Andy collects vinyl records and CDs, goes to concerts, and generally engages in music daily. Andy loves retro video games as well. Chuck is big into sports, especially American football and baseball. He’s a fan of the Minnesota Twins and the Green Bay Packers, but also watches a lot of other sports. Chuck is also a fan of playing chess!

We have two sweet and friendly dogs named District (5 years old) and Cookie (3 years old). We are those weird dog parents who could talk about our dogs all day. Our fur babies love meeting new people and have been wonderful with children of all ages. It’s so sweet to watch our dogs act like totally different animals around children - they treat them as if they are their puppies.

Both of us are huge breakfast people! We’d eat breakfast for any meal of the day. Waffles, cereal, bagels, omelettes, you name it. Cereal is a particular favorite and we frequently eat it as a late night snack. (Chuck’s favorite restaurant in Minneapolis is a breakfast specialty place called the Hen House).
Andy loves pizza, bagels, burritos, anything buffalo chicken, sandwiches, and also trying different cuisines (SE Asian, Latin American, African, etc.). Chuck’s favorite snack by far is movie theatre popcorn. Chuck also enjoys pasta (his mom’s family has Italian heritage) and chicken wild rice soup on cold winter days (a frequent problem here in Minnesota).

Some of our favorite places to travel are Norway (we got engaged in Bergen), Ireland and Northern Ireland, (Andy’s work is based here), and Mexico.
Chuck did a solo trip to Italy and Vatican City a few years ago and loved it. Chuck also did a study abroad in London, which was incredible (and probably involved a little more time in pubs than it should have!). Chuck did an internship in Washington, D.C. and greatly enjoyed working around the capital.
Andy and his brother Corey went on a National Park road trip in the US during which they visited 15 National Parks and State Parks.
Andy has also visited his brother whilst he lived in Mexico and Brazil.
Andy loves to sing, drink a lot of tea and coffee (we’ve got way too many ways to make coffee at home), and check out antique shops, he’s a fan of all things nostalgic.
Andy and Chuck both love history, culture, and the environment. Andy’s favorite podcasts include Office Ladies, Hidden Brain, Criminal, Plants of the Gods, National Park After Dark, and WHAT WENT WRONG. Chuck’s favorite podcasts are focused more on sports, business, and politics such as the Bulwark podcast, Prof G. podcasts, and podcasts about the Green Bay Packers.
Andy is currently working his way through a list of the top 100 films that everyone should watch. Chuck has joined him for several films.
Chuck’s favorite book is Catcher in the Rye and his favorite movie is Good Will Hunting. Chuck’s favorite TV shows include The West Wing, House, M.D., the Office, How I Met Your Mother, and Friends. Andy loves the Office, any Anthony Bourdain/ travel show, any Nathan Fielder show, Black Mirror, Project Runway, and America’s Next Top Model (it’s terrible, but it’s my guilty pleasure).

“If there was one word our friends and families would use to describe us, it would be passionate. We are 100% in on the things we truly care about, whether that's spending meaningful time with others, learning about new things and ideas, exploring our world, protecting our environment, working together to keep our community beautiful, or finding peace and joy in life. We see this passion in our experiences raising and growing with our dogs (our test run before kiddos!), and learning about each other both as individuals and partners. We are Team Pults :)”