Dear friend, Chère amie,

We thank you from the bottom of our hearts for taking the time to read our letter and considering us as potential parents through this extraordinary journey of surrogacy.

First and foremost, allow us to reflect on this significant gesture. It is not easy to engage in such a process. It is a true gift of oneself, one’s time, and a part of one’s energy, including physical energy. This gift is all the more extraordinary as we live in an era and in societies marked by distance and accumulation.

In this sometimes sad world, there remain people scattered across the globe like little seeds of happiness who make the conscious choice to live and give joyfully. These people choose to heal the world in their own way. They share simple things like a smile on the street, a kind word, attentive listening to loved ones, and sometimes they do wonderful things: they plant a seed within a family and create the conditions for love to flourish and multiply within it.

In history books, we often remember the names of men and warriors, however another perspective is possible. We would all benefit from recognizing women and builders whose selflessness contributes to the common legacy of humanity, not as destroyers, but as repairers and builders.

My grandfather, who was spiritual, once told me this legend: "Once upon a time, there was an ordinary woman living in a simple house, in a village as there always have been and always will be. She had a simple existence, spending much time with others, giving water to the birds and stroking the animals' heads. Her eyes were full of compassion for all living creatures. She was an example in her village. One day, a wealthy prince passed through this village and wanted to reward the most generous person in the village by offering them a treasure. The villagers directed him to the house of the woman. He went to her and tried to give her the treasure, hoping to show his great generosity and be blessed in return. But to his great surprise, she refused. Astonished, he asked why. She replied, 'My dear prince, my house is already filled with love, and no material wealth can make it more beautiful. True generosity does not lie in giving what one has in excess, but in sharing what is truly necessary. For me, true wealth is in the peace of heart and the happiness my smile and hands create. Helping others by offering them what they lack is the true essence of generosity.' The prince then went and knocked on every door, talking to every villager, listening to their hearts, and giving them what they truly needed. Sometimes, it was an apple, sometimes a conversation that brought back a beautiful memory, other times a bit of wood to warm up, and still other times some wise advice… In return, he felt an inner peace he had never known before. His heart had woven strong bonds with others. He had mended what had been torn. His hands had helped repair a bit of the world."

If we had to explain the journey of surrogacy, we would choose this tale. It speaks of the real power of generosity, it says that everyone can make a difference in the world, and it finally tells us that the act of self-giving takes nothing away, but brings more to everyone. We personally see it as an affirmation of human dignity. By offering what nature has not allowed us to conceive, you recognize and respect the intrinsic value of us as individuals and our family as LGBTQI+.

Standing by our side in this crucial stage of our lives signifies true friendship to us. The word “friendship” both in French and English shares an analogue root, grounding the concept in love and affection. The English language adds an extra dimension because “friend” shares the same root as “free,” thus highlighting a free will to bestow affection.

There is no better definition of surrogacy: to bestow free and voluntary affection between friends.

This is how we see you: a free person, capable of heeding the call of your heart and freely bestowing your affection upon us. A person who mends a part of the world and plants the seed of love.

In my former experience as a teacher, I often told my students from disadvantaged backgrounds who were hindered by self-censorship: “You are all capable of being excellent students because excellence is not comparing yourself to others; it is giving the best of yourself.” I discover with what you are about to do for us that I was wrong; there exists an infinitely greater stage: giving life for others.

Giving life is a splendid act. It is undoubtedly the most beautiful thing a human being can accomplish during their existence by allowing life to continue within a loving and responsible family.

Thank you for considering us as potential parents. We are full of hope and excited to embark on this journey with you, creating a family built on love, respect, and the extraordinary gift you are ready to offer us.

With all our love, gratitude, and sincere “friendship” and “amity”,

Hâkim and David